Tenure is an ineffective solution to improving universities because it creates barriers within that university. In fact, tenure’s limitations comes from the way it uses up a universities budget and its negative effect on professors teaching styles. Perhaps lowering the entry qualifications for tenure and bringing in more professors will give a greater influence towards more modernized courses.
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I get a little lost with your first and last sentence– your first sentence presents a summary of what your paper– your body paragraphs– have been focusing on. I’m not sure what “barriers within that university” you’re talking about. Specificity there would be helpful. Your last sentence isn’t clear- are you saying we should make it easier for professors to get tenure? How would that lead to modernized courses? A perhaps sentence is a teaser trailer for a new paper, but it has to be grounded in specificity and somewhat related to your paper, otherwise it feels jarring and disconnected.